Forgiveness?

When one receives shocking news a lot of emotions and thoughts can run through the brain. Well the idea of "forgiveness" has been jogging through my mind ever since I received my surprise of the century.

I had written a post about the emotions I went through after receiving my world rocking news, but I decided to keep that private. At least private until I figure some other things out.

But, back to the word of the day, "forgive." The hamsters in my head started turning their exercise wheels and I thought, what do I know about forgiveness? Well, Jesus forgives us everyday for the stupid things we do from horrific crimes to little white lies. In turn we are supposed to forgive others for their wrong-doings against us.

Colossians 3:13-
You must make allowance for each other's faults and forgive the person who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.

But then I thought what is the fundamental definition behind the word "forgive." So, what do I do when I want to know what something means?

No, I don't wikipedia the answer. I only use wikipedia when I am looking up prominent people, like Corky Gonzales. Don't ask me why?

I looked up "forgive" in the good old dictionary (sorry Webster's dictionary, I used my laptop dictionary for this one). Forgive- stop feeling angry or resentful toward someone for an offense, flaw or mistake. Whoa, wait, hold the phone. Forgive is the action of ceasing to feel anger toward someone. There has got to be an alternate definition some where. What about the part that states, forgive- the action of telling someone that feelings of anger or resent have ceased, but their offenses, flaws and mistakes will be held over their heads until the end of time?

See in my eyes I don't know if I have truly forgiven those who have really hurt me. When I refer to someone that has hurt me I think of pain that person has caused for years, not minor bumps and bruises from everyday life.

I think in my mind I say yes I forgave that person a long time ago, but there is always that part of me in the back of my mind reminding me of all the pain that individual put me through and forgiveness flies right out the window. We may say that we forgive others for their mistakes, but what about the really big mistakes. Sin is sin no matter what, but in the human eye there tends to be a scale that rates sin from one (being not so bad) to ten (being extremely hard to truly forgive).

God has the right to be the angriest of us all. We continually turn our backs on Him and don't give Him the glory He deserves, He takes delight in showing His mercy. This is one of those big God quandaries that I cannot wrap my brain around. How can He just forgive us like that even when we mess up continually? I guess the answer to that is His love for us and in His eyes there are no scales or ratings when it comes to our mistakes.

Micah 7:18-19
Where is another God like you, who pardons the sins of the survivors among his people? You cannot stay angry with your people forever, because you delight in showing mercy. Once again you will have compassion on us. you will trample our sins under your feet and throw them in to the depths of the ocean!


The idea of "forgiveness" will still be jogging around in my head for quite sometime when considering my recent news. I hope I can be like Christ and forgive the person that has consumed my thoughts, but right now all I need is time and prayer.

It's comforting to know that God forgives right on the spot. This is also a good reminder to know that God is greater than all of us.

Overflowing with Goose-bumps

This week I find myself obsessed.

I have been fixated on one single song that gave me goose-bumps. It wasn't just the song that gave me chills, it was the moment, the people I was with and the Holy Spirit flooding my heart. I have not felt that connection with Jesus in a long time and at that moment I felt like I could fly.

Some of you might be wondering what melody warranted this kind of reaction. The song is titled "With Everything" by Hillsong United. I've come to learn that this little tune has been available to the public for quite sometime now, but I just got in the loop this last weekend.

When it comes to worship I would have to say that my singing is very conservative. The only time I belt out a verse is when the music is so loud that I cannot hear myself sing. This was partly the case last Sunday at Overflow, a college and 20-somethings ministry at the Kearney Evangelical Free Church. Besides the music booming out of the speakers, I had an entire choir of young people behind me praising the God that they love. It was a very intimate moment. I cannot speak for everyone, but to me it felt that I was one on one with God crying out to him.

Acts 2:2 (NLT) gives a description of what this moment felt like.
"Suddenly, there was a sound from heaven like the roaring of a mighty windstorm in the skies above them, and it filled the house where they were meeting."

There is a point in the song where everyone shouts out "Whoa," and it is such a raw expression but it felt as if I was letting myself go. As my pastor would say I was being more youieyer (in other words I was being who God intended me to be) and I found immense freedom in Him.

I thank God for this experience because it has made me hungry to know Him more. I also want to thank Christ for giving the band at Overflow such unbelievable talent and for giving Hillsong the words and music to write such beautiful songs. I hope all my friends have fun at their concert in KC this Thursday and for those of you who haven't heard this song I will post a link at the end of this post.

I can't wait to have more experiences with my brothers and sisters in Christ and to get to know my Holy Father in a more intimate way. The truth about my obsession is that I am more fixated on my Savior than a melody in a song.

KG and Me

This is one of those random posts that I just felt like writing about. Enjoy or don't enjoy, the choice is yours.

Those of you who know me well know that Kevin Garnett has been my favorite player since he was drafted into the NBA back in 1995. I like him so much in fact that I root for the Celtics despite my dislike for Paul Pierce (who by the way is an "actress." Thanks for that great quote Q. Richardson.)

It is upsetting that The Big Ticket won't be on the floor for Game 2 against the Heat and I do not disagree with the ruling. Although most of the blame should be pointed at The Truth for being a baby. I am more focused on KG's critics riding him for being old and having to many miles on those long legs of his. In this regard I can relate to KG.

Don't get me wrong, I do not have analysts talking about how much my game has been lacking. Lets just say my game has been lacking since birth. I don't warrant any analysts or press time for my basketball skills.

I tend to model my game after KG. Hustle to the ball, rebound , high release on the jump shot, working the elbows and trying to play tough "D." I always leave KG's trash talking element out of my repertoire. Also, I tend to keep my elbows under control, but I have come to find out that I have razor blades for elbows. Now as I am beginning to turn the ripe age of 24 (yes 24 in Oct.) I feel the motor in me sputtering and the ladder getting shorter (for those not up to date on basketball lingo that means I can't jump as high as I used to). With that being said my mind is still able to keep up with the game, but it just forgets to let my body know that. I know I am not that old, but I still feel the affects.

KG and I respect the game and love to play it. We will play on despite what people say. On the court we will always help the team before anything else. For these reasons I can relate to KG and some people should give him a bit of a break. There are not to many 34 year olds that can play at that level.

To conclude this KG rant, I will always be a fan of The BIg Ticket and will always enjoy his game, but once he is gone I believe I will be off the Celtic bandwagon. Especially, if a Mr. Paul Pierce is still on the team.

Weight of the Wheelbarrow

I've had a couple brief moments of freedom this month. This was not a liberation from someone but more of a release from a heavy load. The weight that has been on my mind and heart has been the burden of stress.

Stress seems to be a common occurrence in my life and as my days go on the pressure and anxiety build. I worry about money constantly, I worry about the future often and I worry that I am not a responsible husband for my lovely wife.

At times I feel as if I am the village idiot pushing around a wheelbarrow with a flat tire and overflowing with heavy rocks. Each stone represents a stress and each day I struggle to drive the rusty old wheelbarrow, being ever careful not to spill one single pebble or bolder out of my cargo.

The wheelbarrow also doubles as my bed and when I lay my tired head down to bed my skull rests on the jagged edges of the rocks causing pain and strain. There are many sleepless nights thinking of what tomorrow will bring and the only time I have complete restful sleep is when I am exhausted from the days activities.

I don't have stress all day every day. I have experienced a great sense of relaxation this past week. Why you may ask? Well, the answer to finding peace in my heart and mind is in a solution that I have known for the longest time, but I always tend to lose the answer by trying to lift the weight all on my own.

Instead of fixing the stress on my own I simply let it go. I handed my entire wheelbarrow of rocks over to someone who can conquer these burdens. That someone is my Savior. Christ filled my heart and His presence was deeply felt in my life this past week. I have really missed that feeling in my life.

Matthew 11:28-29-
Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle, and you will find rest for your souls."

I forget that God can handle my problems with ease. I was actually able to fully enjoy time with my wife this past weekend and I was able to appreciate a simple and quiet night at home. Absolutely no worry about employment and bills.

This village idiot in me will tend to show up from time to time, but I pray that God continues to reveal His truths to me. I will continue to seek God and hopefully I receive more moments of freedom and get a break from the wheelbarrow.

God is in control and I am nothing without Him!

Thoughts from the past

The other night I came across this little entry that I had stored on my computer from this past summer. I wrote this entry during a stressful time in my life. During this period I was dealing with a whirlwind of school assignments and preparing myself to be a married man. After reading this I felt that it was a good reminder and I just wanted to share it for the purpose of accountability and possibly the offset chance of helping others.

SUMMER 2009

I feel there is a turning point in my life. Yes, I am getting married in less than two months, but that is not what I am talking about. I am trying to become a man.

Not just any man mind you. A different man, one that many people have probably heard about before.

Before I get to that point I want to reflect on how selfish I have been this past year. I remember that I specifically told myself that I was going to do what pleases me. It occurred a couple months after my fiance moved away and really had lost my best friend. Nothing against the friends I still had, I just felt that a piece of me had left my body. Like someone had come and surgically removed my heart while I was sleeping in the middle of the night.

The year of selfishness began with the idea of me time. Me time was going to be a time where I wanted to do things that benefited me. What it turned out to be was a time to waste time. The idea was to workout and get buff and fit for my future wife, fall into a deeper relationship with Christ (by the way He doesn't dig selfishness, ironically), and prepare for my departure from my hometown, but it turned into procrastination and a ton of television watching.

I turned down a lot of responsibilities that I had at my church. Two main reasons I quit was that I could not handle the politics(for lack of a better word) and I was just not fully committed. I even had some anger. So to accomplish the me time, I quit the leadership team I was on (which was probably good because Christ was not my leader at that point) and decided to eat, sleep, play basketball and sit in the back of the room at church.

It was almost as if I was preparing myself for departure but I was going about it all wrong. I would definitely change some things from my past, but as I have learned now and am going to learn, they all happened for a reason.

Joy has been scarce this past year. It has felt like Hailey's comet, here one minute gone the next and it won't be back until who knows when. As this summer has progressed I have felt a sense of God touching me. He is reaching down and comforting me. Why? I do not know. I am not doing anything different as far as I know. I really think it is His timing. Maybe He is a fed up father that is tired of watching his son fall off the bike and wants to help. He is telling me I can either put the training wheels back on the bike and be safe or I can leave them off and live at a trusting level. Quitting is not an option, which is good but at the same time means the degree of difficulty will probably rise.

It is funny how the steps of manhood could come down to riding a bike. At that age you are not cool if you ride training wheels, but if your good you could probably make it look cool, a least for a little while. The truth is with the safety of training wheels come limits. How many mountain bikers have you seen with training wheels? And the guys from Jackass do not count. God wants us all to drop our safety nets and our selfishness. He wants me to be a man that will ride his two wheel bike anywhere and trust Him when I fall. Once we choose to get on that bike we are not set for glory. It takes hard work and not just any man can survive the journey, especially alone. Help and guidance will be given from the Father.

Earlier when I said that I wanted to be a different man, one that many people have heard about, I was talking about Jesus. God wants our actions to be Christ-like, which from what I have learned so far is that, like Christ, I should be selfless.

So as new milestones approach in my life I am going to try to find that manhood or more importantly the Christ-hood and hold on to those handle bars tight because it will be a bumpy ride.

END

Just a quick update: I love my wife, I love my Savior and I strive to pray for guidance and trust in my Him. Right now my bike is currently riding over the bumps of marriage and new surroundings.I thank God for watching over my wife and I and my family and friends.

I want to leave with this passage I came across the other day that always provides me with encouragement.

Habakkuk 3:17-18 (New International Version)

¹⁷ Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,

¹⁸ yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will be joyful in God my Savior.

Sloth Salesman

As the beads of sweat froze on the back of my neck from the cooling vent that had kicked on for the fifteenth time in the last twenty minutes I realized I am not a salesman. It wasn't the uncomfortable mechanically disable office chair or the lack luster location of my desk, it was my inner sloth.

I had started a new sales job, the first ever in my job history, and was optimistic about all the new experiences I would come across and the variety of skills I would learn. Three days later, I was desperate to get out.

The sweat that had been running down my neck and staining my shirts over the past few days were the result of my nerves. Not nerves of confusion or lack of knowledge, but the thought that I was a sloth in a pack of cheetahs. As for the cooling vent that froze my beads of sweat, well that was just the result of a poor location for my office desk.

When I say that I am a sloth it does not mean that I am a slow learner. I know how to pick things up pretty quick. To make a sale in this cheetah environment you have to strike as many clients as fast as possible in a short amount of time and in those short strikes you need "dollars." It is all about contacts and money.

The part that I loved about the job was the contacting part, but the money part got in the way for me. I had the idea in my head that if a client "doesn't make dollars, it doesn't make cents." This is the exact opposite of how my mind works.

I know the value of money, especially in these economic times and especially since I am a newly married man at the age of 22, but I felt my inner sloth speaking to me.

The sloth in me might be describe as my laziness, but in this instance it was my gut feeling that this was a mistake. I couldn't picture myself asking for money from people that I had built a relationship with so how would I do that with complete strangers?

I respect all salespeople in this world. They definitely have their work cut out for them and as cheetahs they deserve every spot that they earn. I would be an albino cheetah if I stayed in sales.

I am a sloth. The animal often referred to as a sleeper, an eater and dirty. For those that know me the sleeping and eating parts are true. As for being dirty, I try to groom myself regularly.

The dirt in my life comes from the messes that I encounter day-to-day. The foolish mistakes, the aggravating situations, the sadness of death and tragedy and in this instance the loss of a job with great benefits. Nobody can avoid this filth, it just happens.

So as I encountered this big dirt clod of a job that was thrown in my face, I find myself feeling a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. The worry of unemployment hasn't fully settled in quite yet, but I am grateful for this experience.

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance" (James 1:2-3). So I am going to trust the inner sloth that God has given me and find out where He wants me in life and in a career. Hopefully it is a job far away from hyper active cooling vents and mechanically disabled office chairs.

Cartoons

Inspiration from a brawl

Durant Grad McDuffie Turns It Around

Fort Dodge Rhyme

Driving in the car
going really far
adding up the miles
just to see her smile
watching the clock tick
not wanting to get car sick
hanging in the hotel
loving the stinky feet smell
eating all the cookies
and watching the rookie

made by cody and sarah :)

Senior's lecture

You probably won’t ever catch me saying, “Wow, college was the best experience of my life.” This is because I have hope that I experience greater things. I know for a fact that I will never miss those nights of studying with bloodshot eyes into the early morning hours.

One word of advice for those of you who use the late night study technique, Red Bull can be your best friend at one moment and your worst enemy the next. It is quite possible that those were some of the worst stomachaches I have ever experienced. It was as if an actual bull was trying to run out of my belly.

I never really got into the party scene around campus, which was good for my liver. However, it would have been good to meet more people during my time in school. Staying out all night every weekend didn’t seem fun to me. I like to remember the fun that I had, not try to put some memory puzzle together the next day. I’m not saying I never went out, but I am not what you would call a regular party animal.

College can teach you a lot about yourself. For me college has been something that has been in my way ever since I enrolled four years ago. My entire motivation while I have been on campus has been to get out as fast as I can. I never got involved with any campus organizations and only played intramural sports every once in a while. My purpose on campus was to go to school, work and sleep. Which by the way I do all three of those things very well.

Although I have not graduated yet, I do want to give some advice to those that still have a long road ahead before they get their diploma. Enjoy your time in school and try new things, but don’t think college is the highlight of your life. I know that sounds like a cliché, but from my experience this cliché is true. There are many things I did just to get by in class, because I was more focused on starting my career. The truth is your career can start anytime you want it to even when you are in college.

You might be asking if I wish I could go back and do college all over again? The answer is a definite no! I am not going to dwell on mistakes that I have made from my past. Learning from mistakes and moving on is what I am trying to accomplish. However, I am not ruling out the possibility of going back to school for some more of that education.

I do want to thank all the teachers that have influenced me on campus. Whether they were good experiences or bad, each professor taught me something. Sometimes it was something that had nothing to do with the content of the class. For example, my all time favorite class was basketball theory with coach Tom Kropp. We talked more about his life and how bad his daughter was at sports than the game of basketball, which was great.

Now in my immediate future I am going to get married and start a family with the one that I love. I am hoping and praying that there will be better experiences to come in my life with her, and having faith in knowing that there will always be something better to come is why college will be just another memory.

Nascar

I never thought I would see the day that I would be watching an entire Nascar race. The roar of the engine and the precision of every left turn is a site to see. The speed of the drivers and wonderful commentary make it, well... unbearable to watch. My roommate has been a fan for fifteen years and has received a lot of crap from me and his friends. I admire his passion for the sport, but I just do not understand its appeal. An hour has passed and only 1/3 of the race has gone by and yet my roommate is still captivated by the race. I have to admit it would be fun to drive the cars, but to watch 3 hours of cars driving in circles is not the sport for me (if you can call it a sport). Nascar is more like a bunch of billboards on wheels rather than pure sport. Maybe as the race goes on it will grow on me, but I doubt it. Here is a video that summarizes the humor I have for Nascar.

Classic Comedy

I came across this video that I think is good old classic comedy. I do not know much about Foster Brooks other than when ever he talks he sounds like he is drunk. This video is one of the funniest things I have seen in a long time and it just showed me how simple and some what clean comedy can be.

Happy Easter

As my fiance and I found all twelve of the eggs hidden in the yard I realized that I am one big kid. Every year my family paints eggs and hides them just like we did when we were in grade school. I told some of my friends what I was doing this Easter and they chuckled a bit that I would do that instead of sit on the coach and watch the Masters. To be honest I would rather sit outside and do nothing than watch guys play golf all afternoon, besides I can see all the important things that happen on Sportscenter. So, I hope everyone has a good Easter and allows the kid in them to come out. By the way my fiance and I are really good at finding eggs.

Eternally grateful for "Eternal Sunshine"

Watching a movie without seeing any previews or reading any reviews is a scary and dangerous situation. Going into a movie blind is scary because it could be something that changes your life and dangerous because you might end up wasting two hours of your precious time. I guess you can call me a daredevil because I did just that when I popped “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” into my laptop.

The movie was lent to me from a movie connoisseur, who has been known to lend me movies that show more blood and guts than rush hour in an emergency room. He told me this movie was different and he thought I would enjoy it, so I took the risk.

The movie ended up being spectacular and it made me think about my life and the people that I love. I have to admit that I did not think these thoughts throughout the entire movie and I also doubted the capabilities of some of the actors.

The beginning of the movie gave away part of the ending, which in my book is a very risky thing to do. You cannot toy around with flashback scenes when you are trying to tell a story. Flashbacks have to be precise and timely. They must allow deeper insight without disturbing the flow of the plot. There were times in the movie I found myself lost, but I felt that the movie wanted me to be lost so it could come find me again and point me in the right direction. The entire movie is in essence one big flashback, and I felt it was a very creative and complicated story that expressed the need for love and pain in our lives.

Jim Carrey, who plays the lead character Joel, takes on a role that I have never seen him play before. When I think of Jim Carrey, I think of movie titles such as “Dumb and Dumber” and “Ace Ventura: Pet Detective.” It was a bit of a shock to see him in a love story opposite Kate Winslet. Carrey had an outstanding performance. There is something about his eyes and the way you can almost read the thoughts that are going through his character’s head. He really showed his versatility as an actor in this film, and he still manages to fit in his humorous antics.

Winslet, is an actress that makes me think of movie titles such as, well, “Titanic.” Which by the way I am not a big fan, but that is another review that I will probably never write. Her performance in this film is completely different from her “Titanic” days. She plays a fun free spirited girl that is spontaneous to the core. I really enjoyed her character and found myself laughing at her almost as much as Carrey’s character.

Now, I know I didn’t reveal what the movie is really about, but I have come up with two reasons why I am not revealing the plot of this film. First, it is a complicated story that is difficult to write about without ruining the movie for all of you. All you need to know is that Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet are a part of a very creative love story that might make you appreciate your past and look forward to your future. Second, I am offering you the chance to be somewhat of a daredevil like me. After reading this review you will have some clue of what to expect. Whether you will enjoy it or not? That is just one risk you will have to take.

Five years of change, one thing remains the same

Five years ago my high school crush and I had our first date and saw one of the worst movies ever. Today that same high school crush is my fiance and we are still renting horrible movies. We don't rent horrible movies on purpose, but we tend to pick movies that lack plot or purpose. Anyway, April 2 was our 5 year anniversary and it made me think of all the things that have changed in my life, but our love for each other has remained the same. I am not attempting to write a romantic rendition of our relationship, just a summary of the things that I had planned in my life that changed. So here is a list of ten things that have I planned for my life that haven't seem to work out.

1. To play college ball for the UNK Lopers. After I went to the try out I nearly puked and realized that was not going to happen.

2. Become a high school teacher and coach basketball. I helped coach freshmen basketball at Kearney High, but went on a class visit and found out that some teachers have to be baby sitters.

3. Major in multimedia. Just so you know if you stink at programming this major won't work for you.

4. Become a youth pastor or leader. I still haven't ruled this one out, but haven't had time to really pursue this passion.

5. Learn how to play the guitar, so I can sing to my woman. I got a guitar for my birthday 3 years ago, but have only taken two lessons. I still play a mean air guitar.

6. Create a series of funny videos or even a short film. I did make some short two minute videos, but again haven't had time to pursue that passion.

7. Graduate college in four years. This plan is not too far off. I am planning on graduate in 4 and a half years.

8. Get a salesman internship so I can work when I want, wherever I want. I found out that I am not very good at being my own boss, and I wasn't motivated to sell insurance to people.

9. Work at a sports camp in Miami every summer in college. This one was semi-sucess. Last summer was the first summer that I was unable to go down to work. Someday I want to take my fiance down there to meet I the wonderful people I know.

10. Live and work in Nebraska or Colorado. The current plan is to move to Iowa, because my fiance is finishing school there, but hey, maybe that plan will change.

I know this is a pretty boring list, and I am sure many of you have made plans that have not worked out the way you wanted them to. My plans don't always work out, but I am happy with what I am doing now and I have loved every day of being with my fiance.

Fireproof Review

I came across this review via rottentomatoes.com, which I have found to be a very interesting sight. I wrote a review a long time ago in my news writing class about the movie Fireproof. Now, I have to admit I was a little biased, not because I used to watch Kirk Cameron on "Growing Pains," but I am a Christ follower and believe in the sanctity of marriage. So when I wrote my review I never attempted to view the movie from another angle. After reading this review from the Boston Globe I can see some of the points that Michael Hardy makes. He refers to a song that is played in the movie that says to lock the door and throw away the key. People might see this as couples must live miserable lives because they are married and cannot get divorced. When I hear that line I think not every day is going to be magical, but we are not going to quit on each other. For the most part I like the review, not because I agreed with it whole heartedly, but because I appreciate it's view point on the movie. The movie is done very well considering that the filmmakers don't have the Hollywood budget that most movies have. That was one point that I felt was unfair in Hardy's review.

Feeling the Pinch

Money issues have been bombarding me lately and it is really stressing me out. I usually don't type personal little thoughts on my blog, but I feel I need to get some stuff off my chest. Money is important to me, that is to the extent that I have a roof over my head and the essentials to provide. As some of you might know I am getting married in August and I could not be more excited, but I am already dealing with things that only married couples should deal with. My fiance lives in Iowa and needs to find an apartment in May. This new apartment will be our home next year and it is stressing us both out. The reason I am stressed is due to the fact that I have no stinking clue what my job will be in Iowa, so it is hard to determine how much we should spend on rent if we don't even know our income. This weekend I am making a quick trip (no such thing) down to Iowa to look at apartments. I don't know what this will accomplish, but it seems that it must be done. I'm in desperate need of a vacation from all this stress. If you read this, sorry for the amount of complaining, but I might feel better. If this trip does not go well you will hear about it.

Watch the cranes, but don’t be a pain

The Sandhill Cranes flock to central Nebraska every spring but the cranes are not the only living beings that flock to this area every year. These other living beings come with big suburbans, giant binoculars, and thick dark sunglasses. They come from all over to view the graceful cranes that eat and nest near the Platte River. I think it is fascinating that so many people are interested in watching these birds for long periods of time, but it is more amazing that these watchers are more preoccupied with the birds than driving or pulling off to the side of the road.

I have lived out near Ft. Kearny for most of my life and every spring I deal with the song of the cranes at early hours in the morning, but their wake up calls are not the most annoying thing that I have to deal with every spring. The most annoying thing is dodging the crane watchers wondering on the country roads and their parked suburbans taking up most of the street. I have nothing against cranes and I understand that it is necessary for them to come to this area to nest and do what they do, but is it necessary to make such a big deal about these birds? I have encountered few people from Kearney that go out and watch the cranes. This might be due to the crowd that I am around, but most people I have observed watching cranes are from other states or from other parts of Nebraska.

Over the break I happened to talk with a crane watcher from Ann Arbor, Mich. I was reporting for the Kearney Hub by getting video footage of the wild grass fire that occurred on Monday, March 23. Her name was Julie and I was talking to her because she was walking on the hike and bike trail at the Ft. Kearny Park, which was near the scene of the fire. I asked her what her thoughts were about the blazing fire?

“Well, it is really unfortunate,” she said. “I just hope these firemen can get it under control so I can come back later and view the cranes nesting in there habitat.”

My initial reaction was shock. Instead of worrying about human life and the habitat of the other animals that live in the area year round, she wants to worry about her chance of viewing the cranes nest on the Platte River. This has brought me to put together a little poem that summarizes my feelings toward the crane watchers and their actions.


Watch out crane watchers

Every year they come in groups
From all over the nation they travel in troops
I am not talking about the beautiful cranes
I am talking about the people who drive me insane

The people that park on the side of the road
And stare out into cornfields like a bunch of toads
It is fine with me if they want to sit and watch
But it seems to me that these people don't drive much

While they drive they stare out at the birds
And don't pay attention to the road and its curves
They take up the entire road when they drive and park
Luckily most of them go home after dark

The birds probably feel like big deals
I am surprised these people don't serve them meals
The crane watchers seem to think the birds are so precious
But others say when you cook them they are delicious

If you’re going to watch birds make sure you are out of the way
If you do that the locals can deal with you until the beginning of May
Like the courtesy you show cranes, show courtesy to humans
Cause if you don't my head will be fumin'

Watch yourself crane watchers

Every year they come in groups
From all over the nation they travel in troops
I am not talking about the beautiful cranes
I am talking about the people who drive me insane

The people that park on the side of the road
And stare out into cornfields like a bunch of toads
It is fine with me if they want to sit and watch
But it seems to me that these people don't drive much

While they drive they stare out at the birds
And don't pay attention to the road and its curves
They take up the entire road when they drive and park
Luckily most of them go home after dark

The birds probably feel like big deals
I am surprised these people don't serve them meals
The crane watchers seem to think the birds are so precious
But others say when you cook them they are delicious

If your going to watch birds make sure you are out of the way
If you do that the locals can deal with you until the beginning of May
Like the courtesy you show cranes, show courtesy to humans
Cause if you don't my head will be fumin'

Reporting on Suffering

As I sat and listened to Kevin Sites, reporter for The Hot Zone on Yahoo, I found myself very impressed and jealous of his world travels. In my head I thought about how awesome it would be to travel the world and see beautiful landscapes all while taking pictures, writing stories and shooting video. I know it would be a difficult job to do, but what a great opportunity. Then one image from his documentary hit me very hard and I found myself realizing that I could probably never do the job that Sites has done.

In his documentary there was a clip of a Red Cross worker opening a van that was filled with dead children. Then the worker proceeded to pick up a child to show to the camera. It is probably one of the most shocking things I have seen. The body of the boy laid in the workers arms like a heavy blanket, draping down and lifeless. Now I have seen many murders and dead bodies in movies and television shows but this was different. Kevin Sites has done an excellent job at bringing a face to these conflict zones and when I saw this lifeless boy I felt the reality of war in one single frame.

I asked Sites if he has ever felt the need to drop the camera and dive in to help these innocent people that have suffered in the midst of these wars. He told me there have been a couple instances where he has felt that need. One instance, he told me, was in Iran when a group of elderly people were in need and he decided to take action and help instead of reporting their struggles. He said it was like he was helping his grandparents survive. The other instance was in Iraq when he wanted to help a dying man, but passed him by. According to Sites that decision still haunts him today.

These instances that Sites explained to me are the main reasons why I do not think I could perform his job. Personally, I think I would get too attached and feel the need to drop my camera every time to help these suffering people. I remember a story about a photojournalist, Kevin Carter, who committed suicide after winning a Pulitzer for taking a photo of a little South African girl crawling to a food center while being stalked by a vulture. Being in these situations would really take a toll on a reporter and in the example of Carter, he could he lost hope. If I was just reporting and not physically helping in these areas of the world I would feel sick and almost lose some hope as well, but you cannot help others if you take your own life.

I commend Kevin Sites on his excellence in reporting the back stories to these wars. He may not be jumping in to save lives in every war zone, but that is not his job and that is not the best way he can help these people. His main goal is to put a face to these conflicts and make these people who suffer on a daily basis relatable to people around the world.

While, I am probably not going to be a future Kevin Sites, his words and reporting have touched me deeply. It has touched me to the point that I almost need to take a step back and look at the important things in my life. I realize that I am lucky to live in this country where I have freedom to make my own decisions, and I hope that most of my decisions will benefit others more than myself.

I want to personally thank Kevin Sites for coming to UNK to speak and share his story.